7.24.2009

No Glove No Love

I have always felt that it is important to be human, and mammal, and express sexuality.  Repression is cruel, and sex can be a beautiful thing.  However, being only two years out of high school, it scares the hell out of me how many girls from my class are or have had children.  Don't get me wrong, the babies are beautiful and I am so happy for y'all, but I must say I do not believe that at 19-21 we are ready to be parents.  

There is the financial aspect of it all.  
"Here’s the average cost of having a child during their first year of life:
      • Housing $3,450
      • Food $1,110
      • Transportation $1,150
      • Clothing $ 420
      • Health Care $630
      • Child Care and Education $1,470
      • Miscellaneous $1,000

Not only that, but babies are expensive even before they need diapering! It’s estimated that we also spend between $3000-$6000 from conception to delivery, on everything from health care to maternity clothes to extra pickles to satisfy all those cravings." AND, hospital bills are no easy feat.  I went to the hospital for 4 hours and got 2 IV's and a CT and it cost over 6000$.  I cannot imagine a delivery and all the prenatal checkups! I, with my post-Starbucks/Target employment, painting selling would ABSOLUTELY not cover any of those expenses in a year.  I can barely afford vet checkups, toys, and food for my cat.  

The maturity also takes a toll.  I still act like I am 8 years old.  I watch the Disney channel, I like popsicles a whole lot, I cry when I get hurt, and really really like being taken care of.  I could live on my own for sure, but not comfortably.  I like going out with my friends and staying out late, and going shopping, and painting, but many of those things are possible and likely because I am a young adult.  If I had a child, I would not finish school, and I would devote all my time to my child. 

I cannot comprehend caring for a child at this age. I do NOT think we as 20+/- year olds to care for children.  And giving the child to your parents so you can go out is okay a few times, but they are grandparents.  Not parents.  

There is one thing I do want to ask of young parents.  I am not saying you got what was coming to you, not at all.  However, once you have the child and decide to raise it, you really ought to raise it. And that means making some sacrifices that you normally would not have to do at this age.  Having a child means that you are bringing a little human into the world.  

I really don't want this to be as preachy as it is coming off.  I am writing out of extreme concern.  Among being a full-supporter of sexual activity, I am also all for doing it safely.  Planned Parenthood, and tons of health centers and clinics literally give away condoms.  Completely free, you can fill a bag with tons of different kinds of condoms.  Many of those health centers, especially at colleges, will even check for STD's for free.  Birth Control Pills are also becoming extremely affordable with insurance.  And many clinics will help you out if you are really in deep with money.  

As emotionally difficult as it is, adoption and abortion are options.  In many states, abortion is legal, meaning it is done much safer than an illegal abortion.  If it is against one's beliefs, adoption is a wonderful thing.  There are so many couples that cannot conceive for one reason or another, and are totally ready to have a child.  In some cases, adopting parents even help with medical bills.  

Seriously.  We are still so very young, class of 2007.  I love all your babies so far, and please take good care of them.  And people without children? No glove? No love. 

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